


Dreams vs. Reality

by xXSaturnXx



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-08-08 20:51:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16436552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xXSaturnXx/pseuds/xXSaturnXx
Summary: Do you know that?You are dreaming while actually being aware of it?And you can control it, at least a little?Well I think I´m having such a dream right now![Spamano / Smutt]





	Dreams vs. Reality

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there!  
> Welcome to this One-Shot!  
> It´s written from Romanos POV, and started out as a simple smutt story about Romano wondering how if would be to top.  
> But I guess I cannot only do that, so it develops into a bit more at the end :D
> 
> For me Spamano is not so fixed in roles, I like the both of them changing from time to time, not because its just more interestig but it also fits to their relationship :)
> 
> Have fun!
> 
> //Rated 18+ //

Do you know that?  
You are dreaming while actually being aware of it?  
And you can control it, at least a little?  
Well I think I´m having such a dream right now!  
\------  
I don´t know exactly how this dream started, I just found myself wandering around the halls of a somehow familiar house. I knew it was Spain’s house, even if it didn´t look like this. And there was a strange tension around… it made me somehow … eager.  
I for some reason exactly knew where I had to go. So I went slowly upstairs and then to the last room on the right side. As I opened the door, I heard a pleasant whistling.  
And what a nice sight that hit my eyes.  
Even if I didn’t see his face I knew immediately it was him. Spain.  
Fuck, even in my dreams, that Bastard was everywhere.  
His spanish sutpidness had plastered itself in my mind… forever…  
He was bent over to make the bed and was wiggling his ass in front of me. There was a bit of skin visible between his nice tight and black pants -which made his shape just perfect- and his white dress shirt.  
…why was he dressed up so nicely when he was just doing chores, I asked myself while my eyes were glued to the sexy movement of his hips.  
I suddenly felt unbelievable horny and then it hit me…  
This…  
This was going to be a sex dream!  
For a second I was startled.  
Not that this was my first sex dream… of course not… but normally the storyline – if you could call it that- went different. Usually, I was the one being observed like I was doing with Spain now -yes even in my dreams, shut up- and then he would….  
…he would…  
Oh….  
OH!  
Fuck… now that was something new!  
I was wondering about how it would be to top for some time now, but I never was brave enough to tell Spain. I always saw the worst case scenario in my inner eye whenever I had the chance tell him. I would fail and he would laugh, or I would fail and he would be disappointed, or I would fail and he would be mad, or I would fail and he would laugh and suddenly there where all people he knew in the room laughing too…  
So this must be the reason my mind came up with this dream, so I could try without being ashamed… and of course without failing.  
I smiled a little, so why don´t take that chance?  
There was an exited tingling in my stomach as soon as I had decided. And it was my fucking dream, what could possibly go wrong?  
Not caring to close the door, I walked up to him. He wasn’t aware of me yet, so I took the opportunity to grab his waist and grinding my erection against his butt. He gasped surprised and nearly fell forward to the bed, but I held him in place. It was a really nice view in front of me. I gazed at his down bent neck and his broad back and of course his delicious looking ass, I pressed myself against at the moment.  
One of my hands wandered slowly around him to brush over his crotch… he was already hard too. Spain then turned his head to look at me, a slight pink dust painting his cheeks and his eyes where wide. He did not smile at all.  
Normally Spain was that dopy smiley – annoying but cute- nature with gentle sparkling eyes, but when he got horny, they darkened and held something animalistic in them. Now they darkened too, but in a much more submissive way… and it turned me on.  
“What are your doing, Roma?”, he asked as he half-heartedly tried to free himself. His voice sounded seductive and strained with desire.  
“You know that Spain”, I said, enjoying the situation of full control. I pressed against him a bit more and made him whimper softly. Good…  
Then I thought a moment what to do next and got a nice idea.  
I turned him around and pushed him down, so he was sitting on the edge of the freshly made bed. Then I grabbed his jaw and made him look up to me with those sinful green eyes, while I traced his lips with my thump. Without breaking eye contact, he placed a smooch on it and then slowly covered it with his lips and sucked. There was a shadow of a smile on his lips now.  
It made my insides tingle and my mind blank.  
With my free hand and rushed motions I quickly opened my pants so my erection came free, hitting Spain’s cheek and making him close his eyes for a second. I didn´t say anything, I just let his jaw go, to grip his hair and he immediately took his opportunity to give my cock a long lick from the base to the tip. I pushed him forward with my hands on his head and he had to grip my upper legs to stabilize himself.  
Once started there was no need to push him anymore. He was just sooo good at it, it felt amazing. It was a great combination of taking it all in, swirling his tongue, making those aroused and dirty noises and sucking all the right places…just wonderful.  
I took my sweet time to let my fingers wander through his curly hair. I knew for sure the skin there was sensitive, but the way he began to shiver and suck harder when I did that was just… fuck… Now I actually had to push him forward more, burring myself in his mouth.  
One of his hands tightened the grip just below my ass while the other one wandered down… probably to stroke himself. I stopped him, smirking about his startled look.  
“Don´t you dare… this is my job…”, I snapped at him, which caused him to let out am exited little moan and he sucked me harder. Dam… that´s why I love him, even his dream-self was that way, savoring attention from me the most.  
I suddenly didn’t want to wait any longer. I wanted to feel him and make him feel me.  
So I stopped Spain and pushed him so he fell back on the mattress with a surprised gasp.  
Before he could do anything I was over him, ripping his shirt apart. I always wanted to do that and since it was a dream, why the hell not!? And it was a fucking hot view.  
He was squirming under me as I freed him from his pants, of course there was no underwear. I let my fingers wander over his firm chest and stomach, tracing the lines of his hips. His tanned skin felt hot under my fingers, like always when he got exited. And at the moment it looked like he was very excited. I was still fully clothed but that didn’t matter, it was about him alone being naked in my dream.  
“On your hands and knees… now”, I growled lowly, letting his pants fall to the ground and then helping him turn around and raise to his knees, with hurried moves.  
He moaned some more and blushed because he now was totally exposed to me and hesitated.  
“W-wait, I´ve never done that before…”, he stuttered, trying to turn around but my hands on his hips held him in place.  
“Doesn’t matter”, I breathed, aroused as hell to hear that from him. To think that I would be the first one touching him this way… my mind knew what made me turned on.  
“This is my dream, reality doesn’t matter here… look how wet you are there even if it isn’t possible”, I continued positioning myself. “So you will enjoy this right the way I want to you enjoy this…”  
Whit that words I started to enter him slowly, all the way in.  
Finally…  
In this moment I remembered when Spain and I were having sex, he had moaned something about me being wonderfully tight and hot. I didn’t know how it really felt but my imagination came up with a pretty amazing feeling after this description. I let out a relieving breath.  
The dream version of Spain, let his eyes flew wide open a breathless gasp leaving his wide open mouth.  
“Aaaah~ Oh my… Roma…. It’s so big…”, was all he managed to get out, and if we were in a manga, little hearts would fill his speech bubble. Dam, just what I wanted to hear.  
I let myself slowly slip out again just to trust back fully with one swift motion, still holding his ass in place so he couldn’t avoid my trust. His arms gave up on him and his face hit the sheets. After a few seconds he turned a little and looked up to me with that lust strained blushing face. Fuck yes… I trusted again.  
“Ah… please slower… it’s too much”, he moaned but his ass pushing back against my cock told me otherwise.  
I felt myself smiling proudly while I gave few trusts, always going back slowly to slam forward in one quick move, making our skin slapping against each other and his cock hitting his stomach. But it was not enough.  
I put my hand on his shoulder to raise him on his hands and knees again. With the next trust, the sound of skin slapping got louder…much better.  
Within moments I turned him into a moaning, panting mess by keeping up a really fast rhythm. He was screaming my name in the sweetest ways, getting interrupted whenever I hit his sweet spot. Sweat made his skin glistering and my eyes followed a drop on its way down his spine to join a little puddle in a tiny mould right above his tailbone.  
“You like it being fucked this way by me?”, I asked him as he threw back his head. My mind was light and I felt just amazing, enjoying not only my own pleasure but the pleasure I gave to him.  
“Y-Yes… s-so… much… Romaaah~”, he just managed to get out his eyes cloudy with pleasure.  
“Oh my… look at this…”, there was suddenly another voice in the room.  
“If I had just known earlier that Anton is available for THAT”, another voice commented with a snicker.  
Spain’s head snapped up in one swift motion, his eyes once again wide with surprise and embarrassment… must be one of my fantasies about him all blushy and embarrased. Normally it was me freaking out about things like getting caught during sex by friends and Spain just laughing about it, but for some reason I was calm this time.  
I felt like I had control. It was my dream after all, maybe there was a reason behind this. Maybe there was a little part of my sub consciousness that wanted to let Spain’s friends know that I could be the dominant part too. I heard them making fun of me often enough. Spain always scolded them but it made them laughing more because “the feisty cutie needs his dog to protect him”. Good those bastards… I wanted to rip their tongues out and make them eat them.  
But back to the important actions…  
Dream Spain did not agree with me to stay calm and freaked out a little and made a move to crawl away from me, while starring at his friends.  
“Gil…Francis…ah~”, he had to stop talking because I didn’t stop. I just slowed down a bit but hit him harder.  
“Can´t you see? We. Are. Busy.”, I said trusting with each word and made Spain scream in pleasure. He tried to keep calm, but he was already too filled up by his desire. After a few more trusts hit seemed like he forgot his friends where there in the first place.  
I felt victorious and proud about that.  
“Of course we can see that”, the fuckface said, but entered the room nevertheless, followed by the potatomuncher. I could see them watching their friend with hungry eyes.  
Well it was always the bottom that everyone had the hots for no? I´ve watched enough porn to know that.  
I thought about teasing them a little. It made me feel even more dominant with visitors. Suddenly I had the perfect idea for my payback on those idiots.  
…  
God I would never be able to look Spain in the eyes after waking up…  
“Why don´t we give them a little show, Spain?”, I said and grabbed his shoulder again. He just had the time to open his eyes and see his new position. He was now on his knees, and I held his back pressed against my chest with an arm over his upper body to keep his arms by his side. My other hand rested on his waist. The other two fuckers now had a perfect view on this front side.  
Again there was that look of surprise and embarrassment on his face and he tried to hide his face on my neck. Normally it would be easy for him to free himself… because he was stronger than me, but he did not so I continued. I kissed his cheek and slowed down to slowly and gentle thrusts.  
“Feeling embarrassed? You shouldn´t be… you look amazing right now, all hot and messy. Just look at them… how aroused and jealous you make them because they can´t have you that way, just I can… because you love me… and I love you…”  
“Ah… Roma…”, he said with a hoarse voice and nodded slowly. For the first time in this really crazy dream we kissed and it mixed a nice warmth to all that dirtiness.  
Then his half closed eyes shifted and he looked at his friends, liking his lips lazily. I took this opportunity to fasten my trusts again, just enjoying all that heat we were sharing right now with our skin touching as much as possible. He managed to get one arm free and tangled it around my neck.  
“I love you… only you”, Spain moaned making my stomach tingling even more.  
The fuckface and the potatomuncher were just frozen in place.  
“Are you feeling uncomfortable? I can see the bulges in your pants from here”, I said while I continued to fuck that sweet Spanish ass and gave his neck a gentle bite, just to hear him scream in pleasure again.  
“Well… it looks like he is really good”, the potatomuncher said.  
“No he is not. He is amazing”, I corrected them sharply. Then I heard myself continue “…and his mouth is working magic.”  
Ok…Now this was getting clearer.  
There were not just here to watch… I didn´t simply wanted them to know… I wanted them to get a little taste of what they never would have.  
…I already knew how bad and guilty I would feel about doing this with Spain after waking up, not to mention what I was going to do now. I did it nevertheless. It was a dream after all and I could not fully control it.  
I let go of Spain, so he was falling forward, landing on his hands and knees again.  
“Wanna try?”, I then said, settling into a normal speed again. Good thing you don´t get tiered in your dreams.  
They really didn’t need to be told twice and as Spain locked up to let out a loud moan, he was facing two throbbing erections. His eyes darted back to me, and I just nodded. He then began licking over the fuckfaces cock but his eyes were still locked to mine. Darn… he was just too sexy. I could feel myself twitching even more.  
“Hey, hier spielt die Musik”, the potatomuncher said and made a move to grab Spain’s hair.  
“Don´t touch him”, I said in a dangerously low voice. “He may touch you, but you are not allowed to even lay one off your dirty fingers on him.”  
Spain blushed more and led out a strangled moan.  
“How about you take care of both of us then?”, the potatomuncher then said and suddenly Spain had two cocks to let his tongue wander over on the same time. He didn’t had to do much because the movements of me slamming into him where enough to let them both being sucked. And as they came hard, letting Spain swallow everything, I was getting impatient. I wanted him all by myself again.  
So I again raised him his back pressing against my chest. I felt the urgency to cum stronger than ever before and so did Spain. He was squirming more, holding onto my neck for his dear life. I began teasing one of his nipples with one hand while starting to pump his long neglected cock with my other hand. I wanted him to scream even more, while I screwed him senseless.  
“Please… Roma… Please, please make me cum”, was everything he got out to moan and scream over and over again. My speed increased and the sound of our skin slapping together ringed in my ears. I was so close, I could feel myself explode while screaming his name at the same time as he came hard and… I opened my eyes.  
¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬_________________________________________  
I was sitting straight up in bed, my breath hitching, my heart beating like a maniac and… jepp the craziest boner I ever had in my life.  
For fucks sake… that was one hell of a dream…  
I let myself fall back into the pillows again, but I probably should have been more careful because the person beside me began to stir.  
Soon there was a certain Spaniard leaning over me. His face was still sleepy but his eyes where glistering with concern his hands where lingering on my chest.  
“What´s wrong Roma, your heart is racing… did you have a nightmare?”, he asked me kissing my forehead.  
I turned bright red as the thought of him from just a few seconds before rushed through my mind again… and felt guilty.  
“I wouldn´t say it was exactly a nightmare… for me…”, I stammered, trying to hide my boner from him, but I failed because he snuggled up against me, that bastard.  
A smile traced Spains lips, then and he nuzzled my cheeks with his nose.  
“Aww… so it was the good kind of dream… was I in there too?”, he then asked but my face was answer enough for him. “… and what did I do to you?”, he continued with his lips hovering over mine, his eyes getting that well known tone of dark green.  
There it was again, it usually was going this way… he was so used to doing the first step because I did it ever. No wonder he was expecting that in my dreams too…  
But it went so very well in my dream… I could do that in reality too… YES! I just had to think of my dream.  
With a swift move and a push of my dream-self-esteem I managed to turn us around so I was above him.  
"I would rather say… what did I do to you?”, I then said and tried so smirk but it was more a grimace.  
He looked at me with mild surprise, his smile faltering a little and the longer his look lasted the more embarrassed I got… so much for my new found braveness.  
“Well that is-“, he started but I cut him off.  
“… its ridiculous… disgusting, just say it”, I spat already pissed off and on the edge of tearing up and wanted to get off, but he didn’t let me.  
“…no I would never say that. Why would it be? It’s just unexpected”, he said wrapping his arms around me, patiently endured my struggling. “How comes?”  
Since I couldn’t free myself I decided to give in. He wouldn’t accept a half-hearted lie and I couldn’t think of something good… so I finally told him about my thoughts.  
“Well… I was wondering about this for quite some time now… not that I’m complaining about our sexlife… I’m just curios…” I confessed, my voice just a whisper.  
“There is nothing wrong with that”, he answered, his smile brightening again.  
“But… I know you wouldn’t do it. Don’t lie to me, I know it. Your friends told me you wouldn’t let them”, I said, realizing why perhaps they were in the dream too.  
Spain just laughed and nuzzled my face some more.  
“That’s right, I wouldn’t let them… but they are not you, you know?”  
I blinked a few times.  
“What… but… I thought… so… it would be okay?”  
He just nodded.  
“But why didn’t you tell me sooner?”, I blurred out, as if he was the one holding a secret from me. His smile grew softer as he watched me.  
“You never asked me and knowing your pride I couldn´t suggest it. I wondered about it but you never seemed interested in… and I really didn’t know that this was bothering you…”, he said honestly and as I didn’t really looked convenience he held me even closer.  
“Roma… it’s that easy… I love you and sex with you is not just sex, it’s sharing our feelings … so if you have any wishes you should tell me… and if you want to be top, that is okay for me because I fully trust you. Don´t you understand? As long as it’s you and me…”  
Well that was sweet… he was always so sweet.  
“I… I love you”, was out of my mouth before I could help myself. Normally I really had problems with that. He blinked for a few times and then just smiled at me warmly and I gave in to my urge to kiss him.  
“So we can try it someday?”, I whispered against his lips. He looked up to me.  
“How about now?”, he spoke, his smile getting wider and darker. “To let this beauty without attention would be a shame” He let his fingers softly brush over the fabric of my underwear and the still very eager cock beneath it.  
I shuddered at his touch. This sounded very tempting but I hesitated. In my dream I knew exactly what to do… it was probably wrong but at least I had no fear… now my stomach was bubbling rather nervous.  
Spain seemed to notice, his eyes began to shine with understanding.  
“Roma… Don´t worry. It’s not like you have to do this all alone, I will help you. And by the way you are prepared best, because you were in the bottom position before… you know what is important, right?”, he said. His eyebrows furrowed slightly as I did not react at all and he continued. “And of course if you don´t feel ready now, we should wai-“  
He couldn’t end his –again- very cheesy speech because I crushed our lips together in a heated kiss. A soft sigh slipped from his lips as he wrapped his arms around my neck.  
“I want now…”, I managed to mumble - I didn’t trust my voice yet- as I broke the kiss to look in his eyes. They were glistering.  
As I tried to remember what to do next he took my hand and intertwined our fingers for a second to kiss them. Then he took three of my fingers in his mouth and began to suck at them gently, coating them with his salvia. It looked very sexy and I had to swallow.  
Relax… okay relax… oh relax! I remembered that this was the most important fact. I had to make Spain relax before I could screw him, he always made me. Hm… at the moment he looked really relaxed in coherence to me but you got the idea.  
My fingers left his lips with a wet pop and he then licked his lips to catch a drop of salvia. Good that was hot…  
Now it was my turn to do something.  
“I´m waiting to feel them inside of me, so I can take something much bigger after that”, Spain then flatly said with a smile. Well, he was right I had to admit – while completely missing his intention to dirty talk over my nervousness and I think I overheard it because of my nervousness-, I was rather satisfied and proud with my length. I must have been smiling a little at that because Spain suddenly burst into a giggle.  
“Are you thinking what I´m thinking you are thinking right now?”, he guessed.  
“No!”, I snorted turning red and lifting myself a bit. “And stop talking about thinking so much!”  
Of course he overhead last sentence.  
“But you are right. You – and your cock - are the most adorable, sexy and hot things I ever laid my eyes on and I want you to love me now”, he whispered and I felt one of his legs curling around my waist.  
He was tempting me… and it worked.  
I let out a startled gasp and then kissed him again. He was completely different then in my dream, not submissive just simply himself… but I think I preferred it this way.  
With one hand on his chest I steadied myself a bit and carefully let my still very wet other hand wander down. With my thump I easily pulled down the waistband of his boxers.  
“This might hurt a little at first”, I murmured against his lips, trying to remember to do everything right. He just smiled at me and nodded.  
“I know…”  
I stopped in my movements and frowned a little. That sounded too honest…  
“You know…? You mean you know by experience…?”  
He hesitated but nodded unsure over my reaction.  
“Oh. I thought… this isn´t you first…? But you said…?”, I started a little surprised and confused, and he just smiled at me almost apologizing.  
“Well … it’s been a while… but there were some rough times in history…”, was his vague answer. I just looked at him, and suddenly felt like a huge idiot for caring about such a stupid thing and bringing it up. I just wanted to stand up but he didn’t let me.  
“…but It’s a first time for me”, he continued.  
“Well look Spain… you don´t have to say that just to comfort me… I’m a grown up-“  
“You are the first one I´m in love with”, he cut me off and my words just stuck in my throat. I felt my cheeks warm up. But not just my cheeks, my heart sent a warm tingling feeling trough my whole body, with every beat. I swallowed hard and my fucking eyes stung again.  
“… will you…. Will you just shut the fuck up you god dam beautiful bastard…. And let me love you.”  
“Just one more thing… “, he said and chuckled as I glared at him.  
“I really really love you…”, he just snickered and let his hands wander to my neck and hair.  
We continued to kiss and I felt him exhale a little against my lips when I carefully entered him with the tip of my index finger. It felt… interesting, in a good way. Smooth and warm, completely different from what I had imagined. I let my finger slip in deeper and then wiggled around a little unsure.  
Spain hissed a little bit to that and I froze in fear.  
“Roma… be careful your fingernails are scratching me…”  
Oh god… there were so much things to mind… how did Spain managing all this without fearing to hurt me and /or staying turned on. I swallowed again and wiggled… more carefully.  
Spain let out a soft moan his eyes were half closed and his nose wrinkled just a little bit, and I finally understood how he managed. It was just the best to make someone feel pleasure. And I felt myself getting braver. I thought about how crazy I drove him in my dream, I wondered how much I could do in reality.  
Slowly I pressed a second finger in, it was difficult at the beginning, but when I spread them just a little I could feel him shiver.  
“Everything alright…?”, I asked a little unsure. He never had made such noises. Was it good or was it bad? It sounded good tough…  
“…keep going”, came a whispered answer and Spain looked up to me and curled his arms around my neck. His eyes were really really dark and for once there wasn´t a smile gracing his lips. He instead softly bit his lower lip and his breath was a little rasp.  
I was satisfied with his reaction and felt a smirk on my lips. I got a little bolder with my fingers and tried to make him moan more. Not fully giving in Spain tugged me down a little and started to kiss me.  
It made me hot… but also impatient. It did cost me some discipline to control myself and prepare him properly. My movements got a little more hectically but I tried to not scratch him again, even as I added a third finger. It got really thigh, I just could imagine how wonderfully tight it would be when I finally could burry my dick in him.  
As soon as I managed to slip my tree fingers in easily I had enough… no…the problem was I had NOT enough.  
I stopped and we broke the kiss. I stared at him and he starred back at me with his wonderful dark green eyes…. That was it. That was the moment. If I now could manage to turn him around, there would be no way back. I now had to show some guts.  
…  
Again, I got some help.  
Without breaking the eye contact he pushed me away a little so I had to lay beside him. Then he turned around so he was lying on his side too and before I could say anything I shuddered because I felt him pressing himself against me. Now it was my turn to let my eyelids flutter because my fucking cock rubbed against his butt.  
“Dam Spain… we are really going to do this“, I half said and half asked and grabbed the bottle of lube he handed me with shivering hands and I tried not to spoil the sheets too much with the lube.  
“Seems so…”, was the faint answer, and it suddenly seemed not so easy anymore. I could feel he was just as nervous as me. And it somehow made me calmer, because it remembered me of myself. I got up a little and bowed over him, placing a hand on the mattress in front of his chest. Then I kissed his shoulder.  
“Si…”, was my short statement to that and I positioned myself, I didn’t trust my voice right now. Yes, we were going to do this… we were going to do this! I could feel my heartbeat speed up and my senses tingled with excitement. Spain seemed to sense that I was more eager than afraid now and a small smile tugged his lips. I could feel him sighing and relaxing a bit. When I sensed that he was ready I pushed myself forward just a little, dam… he was so tight. I had to use more pressure to push myself in.  
“Ah…just go in slowly… not too much pressure… because when you pass the sphincter it goes in really eas—urgh!”, he tried to tell me but gasped when I suddenly was all the way in. I was surprised as well because he was right, after that really tight part it did go in really smoothly and with the pressure had added I pretty much rammed my cock into him.  
While my eyes grew wider in surprise, his screwed shut and he let out a pained groan. I felt him tense up around me. The feeling was incredible but I had no time to savor it. I panicked instead.  
“Oh God… I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!”, I stammered and tried to pull out again, but he hissed and gripped my hips to stop me. I froze I tried not to move.  
His eyes were still shut and I could see little tears prick at the corner of his eyes, and I felt really really bad. To hide that from me he turned his head a little to press it into the pillow. He tried his hardest to relax and even chuckle a little bit just to not make me feel bad.  
For a moment I wanted to stop there… this was not like in my dream at all. It was terrible. Sure it felt good but just to think about the pain I just caused him… he would always remember that about the first time with me… no, I couldn´t allow that… I decided to not let this be a completely bad memory for Spain.  
“I love you…”, I whispered softly instead and nuzzled his shoulders some more. Then I let my hand slowly caress his neck and wandered down over his chest and stomach just to gently stroke his cock. After a little while I could feel him relax and soft moans began falling of his lips. As his eyes met mine again, the tears were gone and the even smiled a little, honest this time. Instead of pain there was now concern showing in his eyes… maybe because I still watched him with a guilty look.  
“You good?”, he asked ME like the sweet bastard he was.  
“Dumbass… I should ask you that!”, I hissed and blushed a little.  
“Ahaha Sorry… it’s kind of an habit”  
“…”  
“So you good?”  
“God dammit…”, I groaned and decided that this was his dopy way to tell me that he was okay. He breathed out as I let go off his dick to steady myself over him. Our eyes met again and it was like a silent agreement. I slowly pulled out paying attention to Spain’s reaction but also amazed by the pulsing and thigh feeling around my cock. This time I minded his advice and pushed myself forward slowly and steadily, never breaking our gaze.  
It felt amazing, much better than in my dream and I had so moan out loud, while licking my lips. It caused Spain to smile in between his gasps.  
“You look beautiful right now…”, he managed to say and I had to blink. His features were flustered, his cheeks dusted too with slight pink. His eyes glistered and he was smiling, his mouth slightly open to make space for the moans. He was the one looking beautiful right now…  
I took in a deep frustrated breath and tried to stop my head from turn bright red and covered his mouth with one of my hands. There was really one thing he had in common with his dream-self.  
“Shut up”, I gritted between my teeth and tried to hold my breath in. As I felt his lips move under my palm I let my grip tighten. He watched me with a questioning view.  
“Shut up”, I repeated and began to move more steadily and gripped his hips with the free hand while doing so. A drip of sweat run down my nose and dripped on his head as I buried myself in him as deep as I could. When I heard him gasp I finally let out my breath.  
“Stop doing my job”, I whispered with a strained voice and kissed his neck, moving him back and forth with me. Finally I found the spot I was searching for and hit his prostate. I knew it would make him see stars and guessing from his muffled scream I knew he did at the moment. It was kind of hard to hit it with every trust, because it just felt slightly different from all the other spots, I just knew when he tightened up and screamed for sure that I hit it.  
“I have to tell you now that you look beautiful and that I love you…”, I whispered holding back the stupid tears that tried to get out of my eyes.  
“So…You look beautiful… and you feel so good… I love you”, I continued with every trust.  
I felt his lips bent up under my palm and his moans got more intensive. He finally gave me full control and it felt great.  
It felt really good to be top but it was also really hard to make it good for both off us, because not everything that pleasured me did the same to Spain. I could tell from one trust that really felt amazing but made him jerk so I didn’t do it again.  
Finally I trusted him and me enough to release his mouth and I was right, he wasn’t able anymore to say something else beside of moaned demands for more and that beautiful little Spanish/Italian word for yes, paired with my name. More or less the same I did, but I used his Name of course and I said “I love you” for the most times of my long life.  
My legs and back arched from the movement and over sourness and it was a burning feeling but I totally ignored it over my ecstasy, even so that I was completely out of breath. This was fucking hard work and I enjoyed every second.  
And I had the opportunity to observe Spain this time. He didn’t seem very embarrassed… sure his face was dusted red but it looked more like excitement. His aura didn´t seem embarrassed and he even moved a little against me, to intense the friction. One of his hand had gripped the sheets but kept curling and uncurling, depending how I hit him. I could see every muscle move under his glistering tan skin, and I could see how he sucked in breath and exhaled again. I followed a drip of sweat running down his neck and the movement of his adams apple while he swallowed. His curls bounced gently even though they turned darker from the sweat. At some point he couldn’t handle to look back at me anymore and his eyes were almost closed and between the gasps he was biting his lips with his teeth. Everything of this beautiful view got just interrupted from a jerk whenever I hit him. Good he was so god dam gorgeous… and the way his free hand cutely searched for my skin to touch me wherever he could reach… just to get us even closer…  
The urge to release hit me suddenly and very strong and it was hard to hold back longer. I hastily gripped Spain’s cock and began to stroke him, while hoping that he would cum soon too. I didn´t know how long I could stay hard to drive him over the edge after my orgasm. Better not ruining the end of my first time being top.  
I felt more and more sweat running down my spine and face as I focused on hitting his prostate and pumping his cock in a very fast rate. It was really not easy to savor and focus at the same time. It really startled me as Spain’s whole body tensed up and he drew his head back and it cost me a second to realize that he was about to hit his orgasm. I almost stopped my movements but was fast to regain my senses and continued but not holding back anymore. How was I able to do that anyways because the way he tightened around me and screamed in pure ecstasy, and the warm wet sensation on my fingers alone was enough to bring me to my release as well.  
I even had to bow down and biting his neck because I just didn’t know where to go with all my excitement. And somehow the time stopped. All I could hear was my heartbeat… no there was another… I heard Spain’s heartbeat too… they mixed together in a lively rhythm that drove the pleasure trough my body. It was perfect…  
As we both relaxed after what seemed and felt like an eternity my head just spun and I suddenly felt all the effort catch up on me. I couldn´t help myself but collapsed right on top of him after pulling out and getting bright red because of the embarrassment of that.  
I almost expected Spain to start cooing now and embracing me but he kept silent but I could literally HEAR him smiling, that bastard.  
I forced myself to roll the two of us so I laid on my back – I think he helped me secretly - and his head came to rest on my chest. As my arms closed around him he did the same and snuggled close to me, still with that crocked smile.  
“… okay… just say it”, I finial gave up and him the permission to release his spanishness. He started to chuckle immediately.  
“I like that side of you Roma! It´s cute and passionate but also kind of…”, he started but trailed off and got silent all of a sudden. I furrowed my brows together and lifted my head just a little bit to look into his eyes but I couldn’t because he had buried his face in my chest. His curls tingled on my skin. I felt a little prang in my chest. He was supposed to be described with words like knocked out, or super satisfied or spoiled for every other man… that kind of stuff. His behavior was really strange, almost as if he was …sad?  
“What is wrong… “, I asked hesitating and swallowed, feeling my heart sink. “Did I do something … wrong?”  
He shook his head rather furiously and snuggled even closer to me.  
“No! No… it felt good. I would do it again ever and ever… and you told me so much that you loved me and I felt really loved and… “, he had to stop because his voice couldn´t handle it anymore.  
…  
God I had to tell am show him what I felt more often…I suddenly realized.  
I sat up and made him look up at me too. His eyes were a pool of some very mixed feelings, I knew too well by myself. I never expected to see them in Spain’s eyes of all persons.  
“Wait…”, I said cupping his cheeks with both my hands, my voice suddenly very serious. “Be honest to me. Did the following thought pass your mind even for a second after I asked you to top? – I feel that I’m not good enough for him anymore-?”  
The silence that followed to this and his apologetic look was enough for me and I groaned. How did we come up with this angsty shit now? I wanted him to feel good not unwanted about this. He always seemed so confident… I had no Idea he would think such things… but I could understand it too well.  
“Spain… you fucking idiot”, I snapped before I calmed myself down a little and looked at him some more, still holding his face in my hands. I took a deep breath. “Never… ever question my love for you. It took me some decades to realize it but now you can be sure… got it? Its just like you said, I had wishes… and by the way the same goes for you. If there is anything ANYTHING that I should know, even your fears, please share them with me, okay?”, I blurred out my face already starting to burn because of the words I just said. I think I grew in more than one way this night.  
He looked at me for a very long time, and I half expected him to start crying but he didn’t. He just leaned in to kiss me with a grimaced face, which showed how the stress left him. Then he started to laugh during the kiss, but I didn’t let him get away so easily.  
“You are so right… please forgive me for thinking such a thing… I was just taken by surprise and could not think of another reason, but I think I understand now…”, he finally said and showed me one of his brilliant smiles. “Thank you…”, he then said and we kissed some more and we ended up laying both on our side… tangled but able to look in each other’s face. The smile was still on Spain’s face and it suited him so much more than worry. He began to chuckle as the grabbed one of the blankets to cover us.  
“But Roma… I have to admit, it was very interesting to be bottom for you… the way you shut me up was just…”, he said and shuddered a bit, but in a pleasant way. “… I think I could go for it sometimes…”  
First I thought he just said that to please me but when I watched his half closed eyes and his smile, I really believed him…. And felt rather proud of myself.  
“I love you, you bastard….”, I said and smiled for once.  
“And I love you Roma, forever…”, he answered and closed his eyes.  
…  
I know was a perfect moment to close my eyes and drift to sleep but there was still something in my mind, and it blurred out all by itself, I swear!  
“…uhm … would you mind telling your asshole friends what I did to you and how good it was?”  
I just earned a blank stare to that.


End file.
